Sundaze (6.12)

I didn’t make a Sundaze post last week, I’ll admit, but I had a reason. Last week was a bit… eh. Not that it was uneventful – it was… just not in a way that I/we planned? – but I was just too bummed out to even really try to sum up my week in one blog post. Last week was just depressing and disappointing.

This week was better. Still felt like I was constantly being violently thrown around by my emotions but that’s more or less normal for me.

Side note: It’s not Sunday anymore, not even Monday, but due to some unforeseen and unfortunate events (which I’ll likely talk about in great length some other post) I wasn’t able to post this thing on time. I swear, I would have if… if I wasn’t such a severely unfortunate creature doomed forever to suffer ill-fate.

Seriously. I’m pretty sure I angsted about not being able to submit my internship papers on time – through my own stupidity and laziness – but at the beginning of the week, I felt like the Universe really made me suffer for my idiocy. On the day that I was supposed to – finally! – pass my papers, our department’s office goes haywire. They couldn’t print a thing because they couldn’t even turn any of the office’s computers on. It was insane! The timing was too accurate to be coincidental. It was the Universe in action, silently telling me what a moron I was to submit my all-too-important internship papers – the internship that I was so afraid of not getting a month ago – at the very last minute. Eugh, I get it, Universe. Geez.

Underlying. I scoured my drafts folder the other day and stumbled upon a few writings that I’ve all but forgotten I ever wrote. Most were beginnings of a short story, others – the ones that ambitious!me thought could see through – were probably the openings of the supposed Chapter One of this-or-that story. I’ll be honest, after cringing through the opening paragraphs, I realized something. I couldn’t remember what I was thinking of writing when I wrote those drafts. I think I vaguely remember some sort of plot but… no, nothing much. The story drafts barely seem like I wrote them now. What happens after that character gets stabbed? Why was that missing person incident significant even though it was the same as the others? Who the hell are these people? These questions drive me crazy because now I kind of want to throttle my younger self and demand to know what happens next. Hey! That’s exactly what a decent story’s supposed to do! Make you want to throttle the writer for answers!

Nuptial-25. My aunt and uncle’s Silver Wedding Anniversary and Renewal of Vows was pretty fun, all things considered. I got a jar of bubble gum!

Danganronpa. Despite the fact that classes start tomorrow and I really should seriously start thinking about important school matters, I kind of made the sudden rash decision to get into this anime. It’s a horror-mystery anime that involves school kids, murder, and a psychopathic bear thing. A show that’s right up my alley!

Armin. “If what I think is happening is happening… it better not be.” – every unupdated Shingeki no Kyojin fan on Tumblr regarding the latest SnK chapter spoilers.

Zeal. You know, I keep shifting from being completely and utterly terrified and being sort-of, kind-of okay about my internship. The negative part of me is trembling because what if I mess up? What if I ruin my career even before I’ve started it? What if I die?? The positive part of me is reassuring me that I’ve already tried news writing before and basically know how that thing goes. I also kind of know how to talk to people now? And know a thing or two about things and such? It gets annoyingly loud in my head.

End. Summer is over. Really, finally over. If I do good this school year, then this summer would have been my last summer as a student. It’s… depressing.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s